Around 15 to 20 years ago people loved to…
1.
Convince others the iPhone was worth the money by showing them that one app where it looks like you’re drinking a beer:
2.
And also bust out that one lighter app like it was the most incredible thing ever:
3.
Just post the most boring stuff on Facebook:
4.
Or the most weirdly intense:
5.
Think Chuck Norris jokes were the be-all and end-all of comedy:
6.
Watch full-length movies that cost tens of millions of dollars to make on an iPod with a 2-inch screen:
7.
Think that talking baby in the E-Trade commercials was the funniest thing they had ever seen:
8.
Think that typing like this meant you were creative:
10.
Or just add Z’s to every word for no reason:
11.
Take weird pictures of your feet or hands because you all had matching bracelets or shoes:
12.
Argue passionately over whether pirates could beat ninjas in a fight:
13.
Harass everyone on Facebook with like 14 “LOST PHONE, NEED NUMBERS” groups:
14.
And like 17 FarmVille requests:
15.
Fake people out with your voicemail message:
16.
Celebrate National Talk Like a Pirate Day:
17.
Take dramatic photos of Converse:
18.
Or draw a bunch of random stuff on them:
19.
Think 3D movie theater glasses were a fashion statement:
20.
Get obsessed with Doppelgänger Week on Facebook:
21.
Take pictures with that one awful Photo Booth filter:
22.
Own that one white MacBook that got dirty after like a week:
23.
Take weird pictures of your feet or hands because you all had matching bracelets or shoes:
24.
Insist that BlackBerry was way better than iPhone because of Brick Breaker and BBM:
25.
Change your age to 99 years old on Myspace:
26.
Carry around a little leather BDSM case for their flip-phone:
27.
Watch movies on portable DVD players, god rest their soul:
28.
Constantly quote that one Bill O’Reilly video where he swears:
29.
Take selfies with a big-ass digital camera:
30.
Upload 400 pictures to Facebook at once in an album with a title from a Dave Matthews Band song:
31.
Spend money on ringback tones. Sweet, sweet ringback tones:
32.
Change your profile pic to something like this:
34.
Wear shoes big enough to house a family of five:
35.
Update Facebook from a tiny lil’ phone:
36.
Publicly put friends on blast:
37.
Think adding a “xXx” to a screen name made them a force to be reckoned with:
38.
Try to take a selfie with flip phones and completely missing your face, like, 14 times in a row:
39.
Accidentally pull out the charging cable while your iPod was in DO NOT DISCONNECT mode:
40.
And turn on the TV Guide and just completely vibe out:
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