This Mom Asked If She Was Wrong For Letting Her Kids Yell At Her “Boomer” MIL Over Christmas Plans

Here’s the story in her own words:

“My kids’ maternal grandfather (my father) is declining rapidly with dementia. Christmas is right around the corner, and making plans has been a last-minute thing due to figuring out whether maternal grandparents would be able to host Christmas. In the previous 25 years, we have worked around the schedule of [my daughters’] paternal grandparents and [my] sister-in-law. This is the first year that we informed my mother-in-law that we would be going to my parents’ [house] on Christmas Day.

The previous years, my mother-in-law has dictated that we come over Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. My husband called my mother-in-law on speakerphone. She proceeded to yell on the phone that they always had to plan the holidays around us and that we are always an inconvenience.

My daughters overheard what my mother-in-law said and proceeded to get very upset. When my husband tried to explain to his mother that his father-in-law has limited time, his mother responded with, ‘We’re all dying!’

This caused an immediate reaction from both my daughters, [and] they yelled out hurtful things that my mother-in-law took offense to.

No, my in-laws did not have plans yet. In actuality, they have spent the last week moving into a new house.

Now, my oldest daughter wants to cut off the paternal grandparents. My husband thinks my children and I are overreacting by getting upset. My oldest daughter just wants her father to say, ‘Yes, what Grandma said was wrong, and your feelings are valid.’ But of course, he did not say that. Instead, he told her to shut the ‘F’ up.

This caused an even bigger fight within our immediate family. Now, my daughters and I aren’t speaking to my husband, and they do not want to spend Christmas with their paternal grandparents. And my husband says this is all my fault.

Yes, my husband triggered my adult daughter’s ADHD rage. If you don’t know what that is, look it up — it’s a real thing.”