1.
“When they can’t accept a ‘no’ the first time.”
2.
“Trying to make the other person feel dumb. Dude, even if they are dumb, why do you gotta behave like that?”
3.
“Talking down or being rude to servers (or anyone for that matter).”
4.
“Being unable to healthily react to someone setting boundaries, and being unable to set their own clear boundaries.”
6.
“When all his exes are ‘crazy.’ Dated a guy who claimed one of his crazy exes keyed his car. Now that I know what I know about him, I’m not surprised. I wish I could also key his car.”
7.
“Not listening. They hear you, but they don’t fucking LISTEN.”
8.
“Getting easily angered. Huge turn off.”
9.
“Telling women what women find offensive or complimentary, and refusing to accept it when women disagree. If I met a guy on a date who insisted on trying to tell me my own thoughts, I’d get the ick immediately.”
10.
“Not knowing how to do basic things (cooking, doing laundry, etc.) and asking people instead of learning / trying.”
11.
“Self-centered behavior that points to a lack of empathy and respect. Lack of effort in any relationship (be that romantic, workplace, or friendship).”
12.
“Letting their friends be assholes towards you, or turning into a sexist asshole around their friends. Of course, those ones don’t just ‘turn into’ sexist assholes, they just feel okay showing it more.”
13.
“Putting other people down to make them seem better.”
14.
“I hate it when men regularly tell stories about how they’re smarter than everyone around them. We had a substitute teacher at our school who ate lunch with my department daily. Every day, he would tell condescending stories about how stupid everyone is. This included students, teachers, and most often, his wife.”
16.
“Any reference to them being an ‘alpha male.’ No one cares how much money is in your bank account or how many deadlifts you can do.”
17.
“Negative attitudes. This could be as benign as using their dating profile to talk about what they don’t want, but it often ramps up into derogatory language, etc.”
18.
“Lying about the little things you ask them.”
19.
“Treating women differently based on how attractive they are to them. I see it all the time, oh, and being rude to someone because you’re not going to get anything from them.”
20.
“Not being involved in their kids’ lives (if they have them).”
21.
“Posting or sending pics of their cock when no one asked. Arrogance. Being passive when a situation calls for action/assertiveness. Lack of a sense of humor.”
22.
“Self-deprecation. I don’t mind a little bit of funny self deprecating, but there’s a line where it becomes too much or too obvious that it’s not a joke. What’s worse is when it’s not even cloaked in jokes. Just straight up talking shit about yourself comes off as seeking pity. Being pitiful is one thing, but wanting to be seen as pitiful is just…disgusting. I don’t mean a guy talking about his issues, that’s fine! But if all he ever does is play ‘woe is me,’ you start to feel less like his partner and more like his therapist.”
23.
And lastly: “Inconsistency. If you are interested for a while and then I don’t hear from you for days, that’s disappointing.”
If you have any more to add, use the anonymous comments form below, and we may make a follow-up post!