Some Men Are Complaining About How Hard Society Is For Them — Here’s What Women Have To Say

She continues by sharing, “I’m sorry. I don’t want to sound like an asshole: It’s true that help organizations for men are important. Many men also suffer from abusive partners, mental health issues, feel left behind in school, and just…lost in society. But I also kinda hate, how these questions even exist. Or worse: How every time the discussion arises, it’s derailed to the opposite: Not, ‘look what women do,’ but ‘look how women are at fault.'”

“It’s also annoying. Not just because of the ignorance towards women’s invisible labor, but also women’s conditioning as a whole. Just take school. How often did you hear ‘young boys are left behind academically?’ Yes. It’s true: boys don’t do as well as girls. Girls get higher grades, are more likely into college, and receive better reviews. So, how to help them? At best, you get ideas like “more P.E.”, “more breaks,” and “more hands-on approaches”. And yeah, those are all good ideas. But at worst? No! School isn’t entirely misogynistic! Ask any teacher, and they tell you: It’s the damn parents! Girls are expected to be quiet, orderly, and organized. Boys? If boys are rowdy, it’s ‘boys will be boys.” If boys are noisy, it’s ‘boys will be boys.’ Girls are taught to stick together & help each for survival (“Girl Code”). Boys are taught ‘two men can be friends for 20 years without knowing each other’s name.

I’m an ADHD woman, and too many times, I was expected to ‘babysit’ other autistic boys/men. Every time, the expectation came like a favor: ‘Oh, but you’re so competent.’ And it’s true — I am. But that’s not because I was simply ‘born that way.’ In fact, I struggled severely. I had learning disabilities, severe bullying, neglect…it was a fucking boot camp. Y’know how I got better? A female English teacher advocated for me to get diagnosed with autism, because she knew that autism in women gets overlooked. A female counselor helped me get therapy for depression. Men? (TW: Medical Malpractice/Self-Harm) The male head of psychiatry tried to claim I was a ‘hormonal teen girl’ because ‘all teen girls try suicide at 13 years old.’ My male ‘Social Trainer’ tried to keep me in a group below my competence so I could be the ‘practice dummy’ for another girl and two guys.”