Professors Are Sharing The Wildest Excuses Students Have Ever Told Them, Now “My Dog Ate My Homework” Doesn’t Sound That Bad

1.

“I had a student, whom we’ll call Sally. After only attending one week of my class, Sally stopped showing up. When I followed up via email, Sally said she was in the hospital with ovarian cancer. She then divulged that her mother died last year on her birthday — also from ovarian cancer — so she also gets really depressed around ‘this time of year.’ It was September, and according to her records, Sally’s birthday was in June. That was the first weird thing…”

“But assuming the best, I bent over backwards: make-up exams, extra credit, the works. She rarely showed up, failed the midterm, and kept the excuses coming — including once, her supposed ‘roommate’ contacted me and said Sally was hospitalized again for peeing blood. We agreed she’d take an Incomplete this time around and finish the course later, but I never heard from her again. 

A year later, I was hanging out with fellow grad students, and we were discussing student horror stories. I shared the story of Sally, but more with concern and curiosity. But as I was talking, one of the other undergrads asked if Sally had vibrant dyed red hair. When I said yes, they told me about all the lies that Sally told them when she was in their class…two years prior. She also supposedly had breast cancer then, so the stories weren’t lining up.

Fast forward a few years later…I’m talking with a friend, Ellen, who is telling me about a nightmare of a roommate. This roommate doesn’t pay her rent on time and always has the excuse of being hospitalized for cancer treatment. Turns out, IT’S SALLY! Ellen kicks her out, and before then, she even found multiple email accounts Sally used to pose as friends and doctors to contact professors, her job, etc. One of the email addresses was “her friend” who emailed me. 

A few months after Sally is out of the apartment, Ellen gets a phone call from Sally’s supposedly dead mom. Sally’s mom says that she doesn’t know where Sally is, and is worried that something happened to her. Ellen told her the truth; she hadn’t heard from her. And none of us ever saw or heard from Sally ever again. 

This was my one and only run-in with a full-blown pathological liar — and it was truly wild.”

—Razed_by_cats