We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the dumbest thing they ever heard someone they were dating say. Here are the dumbest (and funniest) things they shared:
1.
“During the breakup conversation, the guy I was trying to politely let down said, ‘Yeah, we’ll just see what perspires.’ No dude, we are not going to sweat it out…(he meant transpires).”
—Anonymous
2.
“Ex-boyfriend didn’t believe geese fly south for the winter. He lived in an area (in MN) that had a heated lake, and geese were around in the winter there. I tried to explain, but he didn’t believe me.”
—Anonymous
3.
“Back in the day, when we had the Yellow Pages, my boyfriend wanted to buy a certain type of construction nail and could not figure out why every place he called acted weird and could not help him. He was calling NAIL SALONS!”
—Anonymous
4.
“My ex actually thought that a man’s penis gets hard because there is a BONE in it that makes it hard. She was dead serious about it.”
—Anonymous
5.
“My ex-boyfriend was concerned about having periodic night sweats, so he Googled it. He proceeded to tell me he has menopause.”
—Anonymous
6.
“Me and my now ex-girlfriend and I were watching a documentary on the ‘Lucy’ cave woman. She was getting noticeably upset about something, and when I asked her what was wrong, she responded ‘This is BS, I mean, how do they even know their names?’ I told her, ‘They found them painted on the cave walls.’ Her response was ‘Oh, that makes sense.'”
—Anonymous
7.
“When I was in college, I dated a woman who looked at a map of the United States and asked me where the ocean in the middle of the U.S. was. She visited relatives in Chicago so I think she confused Lake Michigan with an ocean, but my god girl, read a book.”
—Anonymous
8.
“My ex in college thought all women could just secrete breast milk on demand. He asked to try some of mine, and was shocked when I informed him that, in fact, I needed to have a baby first.”
—Anonymous
9.
“I dated someone who thought Jewelry was invented by Jewish people.”
—Anonymous
10.
“I once dated a woman who came over to my house, and when we went into the bedroom, she went to the end of the bed and seriously walked up the little set of steps I had so my small dog could get on and off the bed.”
—Anonymous
11.
“I once had a boyfriend (with longish hair) who confidently told me that he pre-tangled the hair he lost in the shower -before he washed it down the drain, because that would help it all clump together and ‘rinse through’ the drain. Confounded, I informed him that he was the reason the drain needed to be snaked so frequently.”
—Anonymous
12.
“One guy I was dating confidently argued, ‘India is in Africa.’ We argued until I pulled up a map. We didn’t speak again after that.”
—Anonymous
13.
“About two months before I left home to teach English in Japan, I met a gorgeous man. We went out a few times, and as time passed, I grew fond of him. I asked if he would visit me in Japan, to which he replied, ‘I don’t like Chinese food.’ Luckily, I left the country and never saw him again.”
—Anonymous
14.
“An ex-boyfriend of mine, when we were together, seemed profoundly confused when I informed him that, no, a woman can’t get pregnant from oral sex. He was 27 or 28 at the time.”
—Anonymous
15.
“I was dating a guy and was describing my roommate being a homebody, and I said, ‘He lives like a monk,’ and my ex said, ‘I don’t know what that means.” I said, ‘You know a monk.’ Nothing. We were in our mid-twenties and he was in college.”
—Anonymous
16.
“He thought an egg came out when someone finished their period. Like…a chicken egg.”
17.
“We were talking about dinosaurs and he was shocked to hear they were real. Then he proceeded to ask me if they really breathed fire. He thought dinosaurs and dragons were the same thing.”
18.
“When he said he’d make pancakes and then put the dry powder directly in the hot pan.”
19.
“She didn’t understand that you actually have to pay what you spent on credit cards. Like the credit amount she had was supposed to be her monthly limit that just resets each month.”
20.
“My ex asked me, ‘Where does the sun go at night?’ I was dumbfounded. She was in her early 20s at the time.”
21.
And finally, “My girlfriend had graduated grade 12, we were playing Scrabble, and she put down ‘BAJ’, and I said, ‘What’s that ?, and she said, ‘BAJ, like a policeman’s BAJ.'”
—Anonymous
What’s the dumbest thing someone you were dating said? Tell us in the comments or use the anonymous form below:
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