We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the dumbest thing they ever heard someone they were dating say. Here are the dumbest (and funniest) things they shared:
1.
“I went out with a dude who thought women had their periods only when trying to get pregnant. The man was 22.”
—georgehd1998
2.
“My ex brought home a Christmas tree that was too tall for the ceiling, so I said you’ll have to cut about a foot off. So he proceeded to cut it down. From the top of the tree. We ended up with a squared-off tree. I should’ve done it myself.”
—justnik
3.
“I was talking to my ex-girlfriend on our cellphones when she said she had to go because she had to find lost her cellphone.”
—Anonymous
4.
“My college roommate and I were heating water in the microwave for hot cocoa. My ex-boyfriend was so confused and said, ‘You can microwave water?’ We had to explain to him that you could and it was safe. My friend and I still quote that randomly to this day.”
—Anonymous
5.
“I was traveling on business and talking to my girlfriend at the end of the night. She commented on the beautiful full moon where we lived and asked me if I had the same full moon where I was.”
—Anonymous
6.
“I am from Massachusetts. When I told my ex I wanted to go back to New England for the holidays, she said she’d love to but didn’t have a passport.”
—Anonymous
7.
“We were vacationing in New Zealand in late November, and our fishing guide brought up the fact that it was summertime there now, and my ex asked him when they celebrated Christmas.”
—Anonymous
8.
“My girlfriend thought store-bought milk was artificial, and to get real milk, you had to go to a farm.”
—Anonymous
9.
“I dated someone who asked, ‘Has anyone ever been on the moon when it’s just a sliver?'”
—Anonymous
10.
“My husband at the time, now ex, was locked inside the car. Yes, you read that correctly, INSIDE. I had to hit the unlock on the key fob because he couldn’t figure out how to get out. I kid you not, this actually happened.”
—Anonymous
11.
“I dated a guy who said that dinosaurs did not actually exist because they weren’t in the Bible. I asked about fossils, and he said they were put here to ‘test our faith.'”
—Anonymous
12.
“An ex of mine was having body odor issues, so one day I brought it up in the nicest way possible by asking him what his favorite deodorant brand was. His reply? ‘Men don’t wear deodorant, only women do.'”
—Peig77
13.
“During a conversation on religion with his whole family, my ex explained that the story of Genesis is why women have one less rib than men today. He could not be convinced otherwise by a room full of women.”
—Anonymous
14.
“I dated a woman who seriously said, ‘Wow Cinco de Mayo is on the 5th of May this year.’ I didn’t know how to respond. We did not last long.”
—Anonymous
15.
“My ex wanted to get married after a six-month relationship because he said we were breaking the law by having premarital sex. He was afraid we could go to prison.”
—Anonymous
16.
“I went to the opera with a guy. After it ended and the house lights turned on, he said, loud enough for others to hear, ‘I like how they did that with so little dialogue!’ He was not trying to be funny.”
—madeleinemagillb
17.
“My first serious boyfriend was 26 when he found out his blinds weren’t ‘fox’ wood… they were faux wood blinds. I had to explain to him that it was French.”
—saraa4a00f7b8f
18.
“When I asked my ex if he had a vaporizer to smoke weed with, he said yes, and this man proceeded to pull out a HUMIDIFIER! He thought you could just put the weed in the basin where the water would go.”
—cardeezy
19.
“I once dated someone who pronounced the ‘T’ in buffet when referring to the type of restaurant.”
—Shannon1740
20.
And finally, “My daughter’s fiancé just learned that babies come out of the same place where intimacy occurs. When she explained that, he said, ‘Are you sure?’ He is 24. He googled childbirth videos and proceeded to see for himself. He quickly wished he hadn’t.”
—Anonymous
What’s the dumbest thing someone you were dating ever said? Tell us in the comments or use the anonymous form below:
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