Buckle up, because we’ve got a real doozey of a story for you today. Reddit user u/Specken_zee_Doitch is having a real dilemma about his ex-wife, who had an affair.
In his viral Reddit thread, he says, “You cannot make this shit up. I was married once. My ex-wife blew it all to hell by cheating on me with one of my closest fucking friends. That betrayal crushed me, but whatever…I rebuilt.”
He then goes on to share that she also kept his last name after the divorce. “Weird but I let it go,” he adds.
“Fast forward: She marries the guy she cheated with. Fine. Closure. Good for them. But here’s where it goes off the rails… Her new husband’s last name is the same as my first name. So when they hyphenated, their big shiny new married surname is now MY ENTIRE FUCKING LEGAL NAME.”
If you’re a bit confused, he broke it down with an example, “Imagine your name is David Carter. The guy she cheats with is named John David. They marry, hyphenate, and proudly announce themselves as Mr. and Mrs. David-Carter. Which is literally your name.”
“They’re on Facebook, smiling, posting: ‘Here’s to the new official Mr. and Mrs. David-Carter!’ Meanwhile, I’m staring at my phone thinking, ‘Holy fuck, my ex-wife and her affair partner just legally rebranded themselves as me.'”
He also shares that his actual name isn’t common. “People are going to see it and assume it’s me. I am not on their social media. A mutual acquaintance sent me a screenshot with the adjoining text, ‘wtf is wrong with them,'” he says, before adding that he will gladly wager $20 to anyone who doesn’t believe him because he has proof.
He then asks, “So tell me: Am I losing my mind here, or is this just as completely fucked up as it feels?”
The first and most important thought came from user u/K8inspace who said, “Put a freeze on your credit asap.”
Then some well-thought-out responses came in, like u/Bobozett‘s. “It’s a win on your side. You’ll be a constant reminder, a constant presence weighing on their marriage. Every time she signs something, she’ll think of you. Every time someone calls her by her full name, Mrs John David, she’ll think of you whether she wants it or not. Right now, it’s fine; they’re in the honeymoon phase, but eventually, they’ll both feel it, after every fight, every disagreement, especially if (or when) one of them cheats. Meanwhile, you have an objectively funny story to tell and get to move on with your life. They don’t. For them, moving on will be impossible.”
And u/IndominousDragon had an idea, “Send her a message like, ‘It’s sweet of you to want to keep me close to you by hyphenating your names. It’s like we’re still together.’ They probably did it to bother you, but spin that shit back on them and let them get slowly bothered by it. Don’t shut up about it either, when someone mentions it, talk about how it’s concerning she’s still thinking of you after all this time, that you’d have thought she moved on, and how it’s strange she’d want to hold onto you like that. Let the petty games begin.”
“I think it’s definitely weird. For one, why on earth would she ever keep her ex-husband’s name to the point where she is hyphenating it with the new husband’s? Like, why? She clearly has some weird control thing going on, and for some odd reason, her new husband is just going along with it. Cause are you saying that he, too, took on a hyphenated last name? Most men are reluctant to let their spouses hyphenate their names, let alone join in as well. And to do so with her ex-husband’s last name is extra perplexing, to say the least. But no, I don’t think you are overreacting. If you all still have contact, I would ask her why she hasn’t reverted to her maiden name, especially since she knew she was going to remarry,” said u/Terry_Scary69.
And u/LittleCats_3 shared her personal experience, “Wow, that’s fucked up. My husband, when he was divorcing his first wife, stipulated in the divorce that she had to change her last name to something other than his; it didn’t matter what she changed it to, she just couldn’t keep his name. Now I can see why he would do that. Hopefully, anyone who knows you and her will tell them how extremely disgusting this name situation is.”
So, we want to hear from you. Tell us what you think of this in the comments. And if you have an ex who has done something messed up like this, add it in the anonymous comments form below, and we may make a follow-up post!
