1.
This is the eight-year-old bodybuilder Patricia O’Keefe, carrying a 200-pound man on her back:
2.
Speaking of which, this is “Boy Samson,” the 14-year-old “strongest boy in the world” holding up a grown man on a motorcycle circa 1932:
3.
This is Diane Stopky, winner of International Posture Queen in 1957, posing with her award-winning spine:
4.
Speaking of high honors, here’s Gail Hooper AKA Miss National Catfish, 1954:
5.
This is a scene from the I’m sure absolutely electric “Prettiest Ankle Competition” in London in 1930:
6.
This is how some scientists tested the effectiveness football helmets in the 1950s — by banging themselves in the head with a heavy object:
7.
People used to be able to have picnics at the Los Angeles alligator farm:
8.
This is Henry Behrens, at one time the world’s smallest man, doing a little tango with a cat:
9.
These gigantic contraptions are apparently one of the first life preservers ever made:
10.
This is a rubber beauty mask designed to eliminate wrinkles, massage the face, and promote skin health from the 1920s:
11.
This is Robert Earl Hughes, the one-time world’s heaviest man and his pet dog:
12.
The Michelin Man not only used to be absolutely terrifying, but he used to run with a gang of several other musically inclined Michelin men:
13.
Horse diving used to be all the rage. No, really. This is Eunice Padfield and her horse diving head first into a pool of water:
14.
This is George Stern and his prized invention, a fast-vaporizing fluid that basically let you light your hands on fire and not get burned:
15.
Here’s a picture of a very safe, normal setup for parents and a baby to enjoy ice skating from the late 1930s:
16.
Speaking of babies, they used to travel up with the luggage on planes:
17.
Looks totally fine to me:
18.
Here’s another terrifying rubber beauty mask designed to eliminate wrinkles from the 1920s:
19.
Here’s a totally non-unhinged inventino: a GUN was designed to take a picture each time its trigger was pulled:
20.
This is Martin Laurello, AKA “The Human Owl,” a sideshow performer from the early 1900s who could turn his head almost completely around:
21.
Here’s what a treadmill looked like in the 1920s:
22.
Speaking of exercise and weight-loss, for a brief, wonderous moment, portable saunas were a thing. Just look at how happy this man is:
23.
In 1924, a game of Human Chess was played in the Soviet Union:
24.
In 1918, over 30,000 soldiers came together to make a giant human-shield:
25.
This picture, from the early 1900s, shows an early basketball game, kneepads and all:
26.
Here’s another photo of a vintage basketball player, standing in front of a piano and striking fear into the hearts of his opponents:
27.
For one brief, strange moment, WOODEN bathing suits were a thing:
28.
This is apparently a group of teachers getting lit and celebrating Spring Break in the early 1900s:
29.
In 1948, one brave man invented a spoon with a fan on it, meant for cooling soup:
30.
I know you’ve seen a bicycle built for two… but how about a bicycle built for FOUR:
31.
This is the Dynasphere, a giant wheel vehicle invented by Dr. J. A. Purves that could go as a fast as 30 MPH:
32.
This is how condoms were tested in the 1930s:
33.
This is Norwegian speed skater Oscar Mathisen pictured with his many, many, many, many awards and honors throughout the early 1900s:
34.
Here’s a scientist testing out a hands-free shaving machine that used robotic arms:
35.
This is the cross-section of the 1,300 year-old Mark Twain sequoia tree, cut down in 1892 for display in New York:
36.
Huntington Beach in California used to have a bunch of oil derricks on top of it:
37.
This is Alfred Langevin, a man renowned for his very useful talent of being able to smoke out of his eyeball:
38.
This is Stephan Bibrowski, otherwise known as Lionel the Lion-faced Man. Stephan had a condition known as hypertrichosis that caused hair to grow up to eight inches long all over his body including, obviously, his face:
39.
This is the cyclomer, an amphibious bicycle meant to work on both land and sea. It, unfortunately, didn’t catch on:
40.
During World War II, some soldiers would utilize their gas masks while cutting onions:
41.
This right here is a piano specifically designed for people on bedrest:
42.
Before airplanes were pressurized for commercial use, flyers had to wear oxygen masks at higher altitudes:
43.
This is a giant elephant seal, pictured here at a Paris zoo in the 1930s:
44.
In 1936, architect André Basdevant proposed making the Eiffel Tower accessible by car. It would look like this:
45.
Here’s a bunch of soldiers practicing their swimming moves while on land:
46.
And here’s a bunch of kids doing the same:
47.
Here’s another strange way to learn how to swim. Each one of these kids is connected by rope to this “merry-go-round” contraption:
48.
In the 1930s, this couple won an Atlantic City dance marathon after dancing for 1,473 hours:
49.
This is one of the earliest designs for roller skates. They didn’t catch on for some reason:
50.
And, finally, here’s a lady covered head to toe in potatoes: