Can somebody please explain…
1.
The constant use of three dots…
2.
The constant, ear-shatteringly loud ringtones:
3.
And it’s always the marimba:
5.
The volume being BLASTED:
6.
The non-sanctioned swiping:
7.
The never-ending voice texts:
8.
The strange pronounciations:
9.
The grunts… THE GRUNTS:
10.
That one phone case that must be mandatory to buy:
11.
The CONSTANT use of CAPITAL letters:
12.
The ol’ t-shirt squint:
13.
The cyborgian comments:
15.
Texting like it’s 1911:
17.
The constant click-clacking:
18.
Their favorite emoji:
19.
The never-ending wait at the ATM:
20.
The whole “Chipotle” thing:
21.
The insistance on “screenshot:”
22.
The unbelievable assumption:
24.
The tomato juice conundrum:
25.
The hilarity in holes:
27.
Leaving a voicemail like it’s 2007:
28.
Living the au naturel lifestyle:
29.
The old-timey language:
30.
The close, personal relationship:
31.
The severe lack of “mute:”
32.
And the electric story-telling: