1.
The person who may or may not have acquired super powers recently:
2.
The person who’s going to be using every single one of those Chipotle napkins they have stuffed in their center console:
3.
The person whose backseat got a beautiful new paint job:
4.
The person who got but one bean:
5.
The person whose record removal will be an Arthurian task:
6.
The person who made an enemy for life on their bike trip:
7.
The person who got the sorriest excuse for a pizza I have ever seen:
8.
The person who had to deal with this nightmare today:
9.
The person who REALLY needed to get to the 5th floor:
10.
The person whose lobster cake is more like a… you know:
11.
The person who met a friend while taking care of business:
12.
The person whose non-stick pan was more like a, well, you know, STICK pan:
13.
The person who is very, very luck they have their phone:
14.
The person whose hair looks like a Goomba from Super Mario:
15.
The person who got a little extra zip in their coconut:
16.
The person who is being gaslit by Big Carrot:
17.
The person who had THIS happen to them:
18.
The person whose bowl went absolutely nuclear when they needed it the most:
19.
The person whose poor, defenseless floor got absolutely annihilated:
20.
The person who got some delicious sludge in their morning coffee:
21.
The person looking for Schrödinger’s drill:
22.
The person who had a nice, relaxing bath in the trash:
23.
And the person who accidentally stepped on a thumbtack from Ramesses IV’s tomb: