If you identify as a man, there may be a few things you didn’t learn in school, for a myriad of reasons, when it comes to women. So when we asked the BuzzFeed Community, “Women, what are some things the guys aren’t ready to hear about women?” so many women shared their opinions below:
1.
“Men telling women (or girls) to smile… stop it.”
2.
“When I am at work, I am getting PAID to be nice to you. I am not interested in you because I smile at you and help you with something. Why do you not understand this?”
—ThatOneElizabeth
3.
“I am in my late 40s, and I have endured this my entire life. It is so frustrating and ridiculous! Women outnumber men in college enrollment and graduation rates, but we are still not fit to be ‘knowledgeable’ about anything beyond caregiving, teaching, and support roles in business. Fuck that!”
4.
“If we make more money than you, we don’t think you’re a loser or any ‘less of a man.’ But if you are super insecure because we are successful, it’s a huge turnoff and red flag.”
—Anonymous, 38, Italy
5.
“Porn is not a sexual guidebook. And we can tell when you watch way too much of it.”
6.
“When some of us were in middle school and in high school, we were taught how to politely reject you so we don’t get killed by you. And, even after using those tips, we still got verbally abused. Which happens a lot more often than you think. Believe it or not, it really sucks that we have to see you as a possible danger instead of a protector.”
—missmissymaria143
7.
“I shave my face, sideburns, stomach, hands, forearms, feet and toes.”
8.
“Cat👏calling👏is👏awful👏. Also, any overt display of hypermasculinity is so fucking annoying, but men keep doing it without realizing it causes the opposite desired effect (at least in my opinion).”
—big-potato
9.
“We may love reading books and watching movies about bad boy alfa types who don’t ask permission (i.e., kissing, touching, or sexual acts) and don’t take no for an answer (i.e. stalking and kidnapping), but that is fantasy, and most of us want to keep it fantasy. It’s different reading about it from the safety of our homes when we have a way out vs living it and being terrified with no way out. Also, if you have to force or coerce anyone into dating or being physical with you, the problem is you, not them. You are not God’s gift to women.”
10.
“Men CANNOT experience the same things as women. Yes, maybe an ex had a miscarriage and you were upset, but YOU did not experience the mental and physical pain of being a woman having the miscarriage. In my experience, I often hear ‘I’ve been through that too’ when, in fact, there is no humanly way possible for a man to understand some of the things that our bodies do that affect us mentally and physically at the same time.”
—Anonymous
11.
“Guys, she isn’t picking where to eat or what to do because she’s being ‘difficult.’ She’s exhausted from having to make decisions ALL. DAMN. DAY. Because on top of everything you’ve had to do during the day, she also has to decide if her tone in the email is going to get her called a bitch, if where she parks is safe, does she smile at the stranger or is that going to get her harassed, is it a coincidence she’s ran into the same guy in the grocery store multiple times or is he following her. It is constant and draining, and all she wants is not to have to make one more choice. Give her options or just make the actual plans. Take one little bit of emotional labor off her shoulders, PLEASE!”
Women, are there some things guys aren’t ready to hear about women? Tell us what it is and why in the comments or in the Google Form below: