Categories: AllIn the News

This New WSJ Theory About Why Millennials Can’t Afford Homes Has Everyone Like, “WTF?”


WSJ’s Bizarre Take On Millennial Home Ownership

For years, poor avocado toast was the symbol of blaming millennials for not being homeowners, instead of things like housing shortages, high mortgage rates, and soaring home prices. But: no more.

The fine folks over at the Wall Street Journal have finally figured out the “real” reason why homes have been unaffordable for younger generations. Today, over on X, they posted a line from an article with their new theory: “Gen Zers and millennials are swimming in student debt and may never own homes, but they’re splurging on gut-healthy juices and rotisserie chickens.”

Yes, you read that right: we can’t afford to buy homes because we’re “splurging” on rotisserie chicken and juice!

As I’m sure you can imagine, people were absolutely not having it. “Hey, anybody know what stage of capitalism ‘splurging on rotisserie chicken’ is?” one person asked.

“Splurging on rotisserie chicken”

“A rotisserie chicken is $4.99 at Costco. That’s a ‘splurge’?”

“These kids complain about crazy things like the average home price in their area reaching over $1M and the whole time they’re buying 2 ply toilet paper to wipe their ass after their decadent rotisserie chicken and Olipop feasts.”

“Maybe if you pick yourself up by the bootstraps and cut out the—*checks notes* food and beverages… you might be able to afford a home.”

“Me and my homie splurging on juice and chicken.”

“‘splurging’ and it’s them eating food to stay alive.”

And finally, bringing back the classic: “Hey honey, get in here, the new avocado toast just dropped.”

What do you think? Should millennials and Gen-Z stop “splurging” on the fine delicacies of rotisserie chickens and gut-healthy juice, or just rent forever? Let us know in the comments.

Kelley Greene

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