Lorde Opened Up About Her 17-Year Age-Gap Relationship And The Breakup

The singer was linked to Justin Warren, a Universal Music promotions director 17 years her senior, who she appears to have first met in 2009. Though neither officially confirmed the relationship, it’s thought to have begun some time in 2015.

Justin even denied the relationship at one point, saying in 2016, “Ella and I have worked together for years and we’re good friends. Any rumors of us being ‘a pair’ are ridiculous.” However, they were seen embracing on numerous occasions in the years that followed. Then, in a newsletter shared in 2023, Lorde wrote, “I’m living with heartbreak again. It’s different but the same. I ache all the time, I forget why and then remember.”

Her latest single, “What Was That,” was inspired by the period in her life, as she recently told Document, “Whether it was my seven-year relationship or a pandemic or sacrificing my body to my career since I was 16 or 17. This feeling of, Oh, my God, so much has moved through me. And there’s so much mystery and pain. I just held the mic and sort of walked around the room and said it all. I didn’t write anything down, which was cool.”

The now-28-year-old further confirmed the breakup to Rolling Stone in a new interview. She explained, “I went through a breakup. It was so painful, as they are, but there was real dignity to it and grace and a lot of respect. It continues to be a relationship that I cherish.”

The singer moved to London for five months in the middle of everything. “I had this feeling that I had never been alone,” she continued. “There’d always been someone, not even necessarily a romantic partner. And often that was an older person. I was always choosing someone to be God.”

“I think [it was] because of leaving home so young and not quite being ready to be on my own. But I had this very acute sense that I needed to be alone to really meet myself,” she added, calling learning to be alone “really fucking difficult.”