“I Wish I Never Found Out I Was Autistic”: 26 People Share Secrets They Never Wished They’d Learned, And Now I Need Some Fresh Air

3.

“How much my family really struggled financially while raising me and my sister and how they still struggle because of it. To us, we were an average family, fortunate enough to get by, be fed, have a roof over our heads, celebrate Christmas, and get a few things that we wanted every now and then…Until I overheard my mom and grandmother talking about how Mom would put off bills just to get us a toy if we wanted it or clothes we liked. Credit, help from the grandparents, and extremely cautious bill management were what was feeding our lifestyle, essentially, and I was still a kid when I learned this. I starkly remember going years without asking for anything frivolous that wasn’t offered to me first (and still then, usually refusing) because I had this constant fear that it would be the thing that broke that fragile system.”

“We’re still not doing much better now. Still up to their eyeballs in debt. Still not able to get much help. Still leading decently cushy lives and still feeling a little guilty for it even though I never chose it for myself and my parents don’t regret prioritizing our happiness over their finances. I am glad I learned about this so I know not to be greedy or think we’re infallible, but I wish at the very least it would’ve waited until I was older and that there was something significant that I could do to help. I just want to pull them out of this mess for good, but I don’t have the means, and it’s been eating away at me for years. So yeah, I might’ve been better off not knowing.”

— u/Silkren