I Dated Someone In My Friend Group, And Now We’re Over — Here’s 5 Things I Wish I Knew Beforehand

…until the ingredients spoiled. I won’t go into detail too much on the relationship’s demise, but it hurt more than I ever expected. I remember immediately trying to jump back into friend-mode with “A,” for the sake of us and the group, but reality soon kicked in, and the hurt began to seep through my veins. It became something I couldn’t ignore…something, at the time, I felt like I couldn’t escape.

While many people are afforded the luxury of being able to go “no contact” with someone they were trying to get over, I couldn’t really do that with “A” without also alienating myself from our friend group. I’d have to mute the group chats and excuse myself from some group outings because “A” would be there, and I didn’t think that was fair. When we hung out, the unconscious flirting resumed, and we fell right back into how we always were with each other. Other times, I felt myself plastering a smile on my face, trying my best to hide the fact that my heart was broken. I did everything I could to shake the pain away and keep the overthinking to a minimum, but neither subsided for a very, very long time.

Celeste sang it best: “Isn’t it strange how people can change from strangers to friends, friends into lovers, and strangers again?” (I played this song an unholy amount of times during my healing journey, along with Aaliyah’s “The One I Gave My Heart To,” Adele’s “To Be Loved,” and Olivia Rodrigo’s “Traitor,” FLO’s “Losing You,” Jorja Smith’s “Don’t Watch Me Cry,” Deborah Cox and RL’s “We Can’t Be Friends,” and Mariah Carey’s “My All.”)