As a queer man who’s lived in Mumbai, Delhi, and Kolkata, I can confidently say since the first time I discovered and downloaded Grindr, the people I’ve come across have given me enough data to write a thesis and earn a PhD in sociology.
So, here I am sharing all my findings with you today.
The characters you meet range from protein-shake guzzling gym bros to full-time trolls running their toxicity startups. Some want a hookup, some (very rarely) want a partner, but most of them seem like unofficial census officers who want you to summarize your existence in the form of age, location, preference, sexual position, and your residential status.
And while queer life in India is slowly moving forward, being on Grindr feels less like Heartstopper and more like being on an episode of Bigg Boss.
So whether you’re dodging bizarre checklists or deciphering messages, here’s a rundown of Grindr profiles you’re guaranteed to see if you’re queer and swiping in India.
6.
The “Dora The Explorer”
9.
The “Meet” Machine
10.
P.S. While this list focuses on the types of profiles I’ve personally encountered as a queer cis man in India, it’s important to acknowledge that Grindr isn’t just for cis gay men. Many trans men, trans women, and non-binary folks use the app too, each with their own experiences, challenges, and joys. This piece is meant purely for entertainment and satire, not to erase or overlook the diversity of identities that exist within the queer community on Grindr.
12.
Finally, everyone deserves better bios, fewer ghosting, and fewer “Sup?” messages at 3 AM, so if you’re on Grindr, be better.